>^,,^<Thou shalt jump onto the keyboard when thy human is on the modem.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt pull the phone cord out of the back of the modem.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt unroll all of the toilet paper off the roll.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt sit in front of the television or monitor, as thou art  transparent.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt projectile vomit from the top of the refrigerator.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt walk in on a dinner party and commence licking thy butt.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt lie down with thy butt in thy human's face.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt leap from great heights onto thy human's genital region.

>^,,^<  Fast as thou are, thou can run through closed doors.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt reset thy human's alarm clock by walking on it.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt climb on the garbage can with the hinged lid, as thou wilt fall in and trap thyself.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt jump onto the toilet seat just as thy human is sitting down.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt jump onto thy sleeping human's bladder at 4a.m.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt realize that the house is a prison from which to escape at any opportunity.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt trip thy humans if they are walking too slow.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt push open the bathroom door when there are guests in thy house.

>^,,^<  Thou shalt remember that even though thou are a carnivore,  houseplants are meat.